Escalante Excursion: Part 1

After an untimely and tragic bout of dudes-backing-out-the-night-before-our-epic-trip, our once-vast legion of brochachos had dwindled to three bandoleers, bound by honor and a wanderlust for the epic outdoors to press on and venture forth into the great deserts west of home. I was very apprehensive about continuing on the trip and had secretly wondered if the universe was trying to give me a sign when this occurred - I had been fighting a losing battle with the head cold from hell for the four days previous to our departure. Could it be divine intervention? Could it be providence's holy hand throwing a holy hand grenade into our wicker basket of outdoor bounty? Ye may never know for sure, but I can safely say that this was an instance where I went against my better judgement. I certainly suffered great personal sacrifice and napped for half of the journey out to the Staircase. That being said, my better judgement be damned! It was totally worth it.

Day 1:

We left the Woolly Mammoth Park-n-Ride in Morrison around 8:00 AM and made great time to Grand County. During a studious break from his awesome and loving and supportive wife some evening, Nathaniel had learned of a free wine tasting room in the heart of cozy Palisade, CO. We enjoyed (read: Nathaniel and I wrestled like starving grizzly bears for first dibs) a much needed bathroom break and mingled with the local terroir host. His name was Lance, he was nice in a trying-to-covertly-sell-you-drastically-overpriced-wine-while-downplaying-the-reasonable-and-delicious-cheap-stuff sort of way. Unfortunately, we didn't get any free swag or photos with him, but he did give us leave to eat a picnic on the lawn furniture in front. Underneath a huge cottonwood tree, I downed some more cold medicine and attempted to taste any of our (I'm told by the guys, and trust based on Josie's culinary reputation) delicious lunch.

Exhibit A: Picnicking in the middle of a Cabernet grove. Groovy.

Exhibit B: Looking north through fields of plenty that will one day produce the nectar of the gods that has made this region of Colorado so wholesome in a high-society boozy-sort of way.

Exhibit C: Looking south east at more beautiful cliffs and the lovely lawn upon which we feasted.

After about an hour's rest, we packed up the Jeep and meandered through the scenic half-block downtown while looking for directions to the interstate. We pointed the car west, threw on some Dragonforce Pandora and we were off. Somewhere around Capitol Reef National Park, Mark offered to drive for a bit and I conked out in the backseat. Nathaniel will have to make an addendum to this post to account for what went on during that short stint.

Rocks. 

Trees and rocks.

The hieroglyphs that we saw all resembled Dr. Seuss characters... the Fremont Indians were way ahead of their time.  

This picture is bigger because we were farther away from this cliff. The glyphs here can be seen left of center. More triangular, Seussical figures. 

You need to visit this place.

Fast forward umpteen hours.

When we finally reached Calf Creek, we were nonplussed to learn that the campsite was full. We had just passed a sign that read "Hell's Backbone -> 25 Miles" and were near Box Death Hollow WSA. Outside of this little creek bed, the surrounding canyons didn't exactly seem... inviting. Nevertheless, we bandoleers made like outlaws and setup camp around four miles south in a sand pit next to a sweeping sandstone canyon.

Hell's Backbone in the distance. Escalante River in the foreground canyon. 

Mark being outdoorsy. The bed of sand, although I'm still washing it out of my clothes, was super comfortable to sleep on.

Nathaniel also being outdoorsy. 

We elected to hike into the canyon and explore since we'd just rode a veritable eternity in the Jeep out there. We were pleasantly wowed by the diversity and textures of the terrain we had stumbled upon. The sandstone was so soft that it would break off it you put too much lateral pressure on the rock anywhere, and so it seemed each slab had a unique personality to it. Where there had been obvious water movement, there were dry pools and curves etched into the rock as it cascaded towards the valley below. I felt very much at home with my background in chemistry when I thought to myself "How great would it be to be a water molecule in a rainstorm out here? This would be so much fun to slide down!" This jovial moment was then followed by the dual sobering realizations that I spend way too much time with eleven and twelve year old kids and that I really need a vacation.

Looking back towards the campsite from the ridge.

Future slot canyon?

Sweet striations!

Trips like this make me want to be a geologist.

The rest of the night was fairly low key. We made dinner on the camp stove and fell asleep early. I felt like I would die walking up the canyon back to the campsite, and my dear companions bestowed on me the honor of cooking and doing all the dishes for the first night. It was awesome - good times. I'm still waiting for the incubation period for whatever alien-engineered death microbe that I had to end for them both, and it hit them when they least expect it bwahahahahaha! Just kidding... mostly.